FESTIVUS: The Airing of Grievances

continue to mock our intelligence by appearing in poorly acted and written Howard’s commercials all season long?

Maybe it’s the recession, or Tony Reagins, or too much Christmas party eggnog spiked with Everclear, but Santa has really disappointed me this year. I noticed the old bum has dropped a large dark lump in my stocking hanging from the fireplace and my nose tells me that it ain’t coal! My worst fear is that it might be Derek Lowe.

1.) Lackey I know it’s business but you still broke my heart.

2.) Damn you Congress for trying to pass this shit storm of a health bill before people have even had a chance to read it.

3.) Damn you America for not making a bigger stink about said health bill. (I guess we’re all too bogged down by shopping and egg nog hangovers to care)

4.) Why hasn’t DonoRomantico been banned yet?

5.) All bay area sports teams can go to Hades. (that includes you SJ sharks)

6.) Damn you people who instead of bringing up an issue to your face, instead decide to email you about it and cc your boss.

7.) My roommate for not ever wanting to watch Curb Your Enthusiasm.

That is all, for now.

1) chivas 18 commercials. i hate euro douchebags
2) lackey. i hate texas douchebags.
3) construction on orangethorpe. i hate union workers.
4) ninjas. (except michael dudikoff)
5) time warner cable. burn in hell.
6) at&t uverse. can i get some AMC in HD please?
7) NOTW stickers. commercializing your faith is vomit inducing.

1.) Bad fanposts.
2.) PennDOT. Road in town (main one to my work) has been shut down for a month. Think Caltrans x’s 100
3.) Beckett, just because

Charlie Rose
Pete Rose

in that order.

Why do other teams ask us to decimate our 25 man roster, and then give away the player for an Abba-Zabba bar and a bucket of balls?

1. Flatbillers in MLB
2. “Fans” in expensive seats who don’t know about or pay attention to the game
3. Scioscia’s interviews: less press release, more human being

1) Living in Georgia.
2) The housing market (hence me living in Georgia).
3) The lack of a job (hence me living in Georgia).
4) My cat having a hairball on my couch.
5) TeaParty morons.
6) Angels Doomsayers.

1. Dumb ass GM’s/owners who drive up the prices good players expect by giving guys like Jason Marquis 7.5 million a year. Yes, that included our GMJ 10 mil a year signing.
2. Sleezy agents who only care about the highest dollar amount so they get the biggest commission possible
3. people who dont understand you do not win championships with an all star team and keep crying to bring in big name players rather than develop some like KMo, and hopefully Wood
4. The fact angel stadium requires a full price ticket for my 2 year old
5. Umpires.
6. people who think the east coast is better than the west.

1) Contrived slogans such as “win with what we’ve got”

2) Snow that has to be measured in feet, not inches

3) Waiting for “tomorrow” to fix what is broken today (“the free agent class is stronger next year” crowd….)

4) Fox baseball announcers…all of them

5) Scott Boras represented baseball players

6) Federal and state income taxes

7) Pitchers who are allowed to take 3 or 4 minutes grooming themselves after every pitch

8) Every aspect of the NY, Boston and Philadelphia sports scene

9) Buzzy Bavasi (primarily for the jackass comment declaring that Nolan Ryan could be replaced with two “8-7” pitchers….)

10) Drunk drivers

1) Whiny posts about our of trades or lack of free-agent signings

2) HH Trolls who only whine about our lack of trades and free-agent signings

3) Doggie farts

4) People who feel they have to fanpost old news that already exists as a fanshot

5) Hawk Harrelson

6) Having no baseball to watch during the winter

7) South Coast Plaza during the holidays

8) Expensive relief pitchers

9) John Lackey

10) Lady Gaga

1) Fanposters who don’t use tags.

I have nothing else to complain about.

In no particular order…

1. Nearly everything about this post season.

2. The fact that I’ve only done half my Christmas shopping

3. Opening day is like 100 days away.

4. That my facebook seeming exploded with Yankee fans come ALCS time. However it did help me thin out my friends list on facebook.

5. That Yankee fans claim World Series victories in 1923 and 1927 as their own. (We’ve won 27!)

6. This will be the first Adenhart Christmas without their son (that one kills me).

7. John Lackey and hearing about game 7. Game 7 doesn’t exonerate you from being a money grubbing asshole.

8. ESPN

9. Fox Sports

10. The Los Angeles Dodgers.

Everything else went more or less how I expected it to. Doesn’t make it right, but Rex is going to be my one grievance. How joyless and deprived of myrth the rockpile is going to be next year. Just not right…

Everyone else’s grief will sufficiently cover my ire over Lackey et al.

Anyway, I’m not going to create my own Fanshot about this because it’s 100% OT and I’d be simply asking for a blogwhore’s flamefest, so since we’re discussing Christmas (okay, not really, more an irreverent Christmas offshoot) here’s the best place for me to mention this (maybe):

I do a podcast and the current show is the Christmas version. You should listen to it. The podcast itself is called The Swinging Wake. The Christmas episode is called “A Fraggle Stick Car Christmas.”

It’s up at SwingingWakeRadio.com

Listen to it. Or don’t. You have nothing to lose except your sanity.

Merry Ho Ho.

1. Fans who honestly think that they know more than the people running the team
2. People that find it necessary to call into a radio station
3. Dodgers and Red Sox fans that act like ass hats at a game
4. Angels fans that choose to act like Dodgers or Red Sox ass hat fans
5. The Dutch
6. People that treat new people poorly. Idiots I understand but new HH people should be welcomed.
7. Douche bags. I live in HB so this is a constant for me.
8. Loud drunks at games. Loud drunks anywhere really. Drink at home like the rest of us.
9. GMJ and all of his GMJness
10. ARod for winning a ring in the same year he admited PED use.
11. The media for all their Yankee talk
12. Selig for not working harder to speed up and improve the game
13. Lackey, for leaving and making my son cry
14. Figgy, for leaving and making my daughter cry (I really don’t blame them though)
15. My boss for sharing way to much about his divorce with me
16. My employees for bitching non-stop
17. Myself for only reading 2 books all year but still having time to check this website 3 times a day
18. Andrew Gallo

There’s only two things I hate in this world. People who are intolerant of other people’s cultures and the Dutch.

  1) Vlad most likely not being on the team. Sometimes I feel like that girl from the u tube.

  2)John Lackey’s ugly face up on the front page. ‘Ode to my ass hair’ is what it should say

   3)not re-signing FIGGY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

   4)WTF?? way more money and no better talent than our own DO, who is now a Ranger. (my feeling on Rodney)

   5)Countries that lock people in cages for a plant. (they would charge God with manufacture and intent to distribute if they could.)

   6)Why do they keep giving millions of dollars to players who suck at their jobs? (I’m talking to you ____________ (fill in the blank).

   7)people that whine about posts like this.

   8)slow ass old people who think they can talk on their phone and drive at the same time.

my list of hates!!

1. drunk doyer fans
2. any raider fan
3. my teams never seeming to want to spend big money on some very good talent

1. Raiders fans who still think they’re going to the Super Bowl…….this year. (good call, petey)
2. Shields being VERY overlooked by posters here as having a presence next year.
3. People not realizing we have three All-Stars for starting pitchers, and the other one was on the cover of a video game(success in my book).
4. Arredondo gone….I truly thought he was going to be the next big thing.
5. IEDs
6. Snowbirds in Yuma, AZ
7. Michael Bay(worst director, ever).
8. Guidos and Guidettes
9. Shields is the LAST player remaining……

Sweeping the Red Sox* in the ALDS.

Just got done celebrating Festivus over here in Afghanistan. There was an aluminum pole, the airing of grievances and feats of strength. All this was culminated with our First Sergeant wrestling one of the junior lieutenants. Just checking in. Merry Festivus, everyone!

no particular order:

1. all national baseball announcers (local aok)
2. Tim Tebow, Brett Farve (mainly because of ESPN love affair, and latter includes being an ass, can’t decide to stay retire)
3. both NY baseball team and Red Sox unintelligent fans (know your players)
4. facebookers who only talk about the team during the highs (aka rooting during playoffs)
5. LOST fans
6. angry person in newspaper who ranted that Christmas was the only holiday in December, and nothing else matter
7. winter cold and snow
8. twitter
9. Scott Boras
10. Avatar hype

Who made that stupid decision? I haven’t heard that yet.