…Fenway Pahk of course. After all, it is named after a swamp.

and the place smells awful.

I do live in this area, you know. I don’t need lectures on Los Angeles traffic (I live closer to Dodger Stadium than most Orange County folks).

It’s ugly because of its color scheme. The pale blue coloration, the 60s pastel seats that look like furniture from an episode of the Brady Bunch, and the outfield pavilion roof designs…they all look like they should have been redesigned decades ago and no one got around to it. Chipped concrete, a monstrosity of a parking lot (in the worst location on earth, mind you…there are like 2 decent paths off of that ravine. Average time to get out of Dodger Stadium is about 3x what it takes me to get away from the numerous other parks I’ve been to). And it wasn’t until recently that they allowed us to stop pissing in troughs in the men’s room. But yes, it smells of urine everywhere I go. Almost as much as it did at Wrigley.

I’m sorry, but I’ve been to too many stadiums to buy your excuses for the Dodger fan base. When I was 14-15 years old, I went to a game at Dodger Stadium with a Giants jersey on. I couldn’t have been more than 5’4" and about 115 pounds. I was threatened with assault by numerous fat, belligerent fucks. I’ve done similar at plenty of other parks without more than a friendly heckle. The average fan in that game NOT in box seats probably has 3 felony assault convictions. Every time I go, a fight breaks out. Every time I go, someone is dragged out in handcuffs, covered on every square inch by tattoos. Every time I go, gangs are getting drunk by the front entrance and in shouting matches with security over the need to empty their liquor before entering the park. I’m not bringing my kids there until they’re old enough to defend themselves against the thugs that roam that park. And yes, I go more than a handful of times every year myself, so I’m not mindlessly stereotyping.

But apparently I’m supposed to be impressed because the second largest city in the country manages to fill a stadium every night. Too bad the fans are fucking morons and, regardless of what you may say, come late and leave early like no other. Go watch the Kirk Gibson home run sometime and see how many tail lights you can spot in the outfield parking light. I’ve been to Shea and Yankee Stadium…certainly not easy traffic around those parts either. Neither stadium emptied out half as quickly.