Angels Sweep Yankees; All Star Brian Fuentes Gets Save #26

Final Score in Los Angeles of Anaheim: Angels 5, Yankees 4

The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim swept the New York Yankees with a nail-biting 5-4 victory Sunday afternoon in Anaheim.

Oh, does this sound like a boring baseball game writeup? Well we can fix that with a dose of bikini wax. yes, Mark Teixiera and Alex Roodriguez both had their pub folics waxed in the hopes of keeping an 8-game road win streak alive. Robinson Cano was spotted in a thong waiting in line for the Pirates of the Caribbean late Saturday night and Melky Cabrera cruised West Hollywood looking for male tail ... but there was no lucky set of buns to rub ... none of these adventures in dorking out in your Don Ed Hardy shirts brought the East Coast tourists any luck, although rumor has it that Joe Giradi beat Jorge Posada in an In-N-Out burger eating contest before Sunday's matchup.

That was the lone highlight and All Stars Derek Jeter and Mark Teixeira will have some indigestion on the plane ride to St. Louis knowing that they faced the Angels without Torii Hunter AND Vladimir Guerrero and still had their noses rubbed deep into a moist umber-colored place where the California Sun don't shine.

John Lackey got a deserved W, Darren Oliver stuffed the YanTurKees with the bases loaded and nobody out after Justin Speier proved the 4th law of thermodynamics (the one that states that a body in motion to left handed batter will suck if that body is named Justin Speier) to be true yet again and All Star Brian Fuentes struck out non-All-Star Alex Rodriguez to end the game.

On offense, the Angels spread it around. 5 Angels scored a run each and each of the 5 Ribbies was shared by a Halo. The Angels scored 29 runs in the three game series without their two biggest bats and with Juan Rivera, their 3rd biggest bat, hurt for the final two games. And the Angel defense, led by All-Star (in my humble opinion) Chone Figgins, was... well I am out of adjectives for greatness, so let's just say it was An-frickin-gelic for California fans and hurt more than a winter bikini wax if you were rooting against Holy Red.

It is called domination. Bow to your master, New York, bow and keep that head down in subservient shame. Thank you very much!

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