You dreamed of reading this.
Let's go over everything that has happened since the season ended on September 28:
- Chowdz eliminated.
- Tony Reagins resigned.
- The Yankees lost in the playoffs.
- Bunt-whining Justin Verlander and the Tigers lost in the playoffs.
- The Rangers lost the World Series after twice being within one strike of their first world championship.
- In hiring Jerry Dipoto, the Angels avoided hiring Omar Minaya.
- Dipoto hired what appears to be a great team of administrators.
- Erick Aybar wins the AL SS Gold Glove
- Turns out a General Manager actually talks to the press? Who'da thunk it?!?!?!
- A suitable replacement for Jeff Mathis was acquired in the person of Chris Iannetta.
- Out of his depth sportswriter Lyle M. Spencer is reassigned from covering the Angels for the team website.
- Mathis was then traded for an actual AAA player with a smidgen of upside.
- LaTroy Hawkins signed for one year, $3 million.
- C.J. Wilson.
- Albert Pujols.
- 4,200 fans attend an outdoor press conference and boo an ESPN faux reporter bimbo who asks a stupid question.
- Turns out that Arte and his wife are Lars Von Trier fans!
And 70 days to spare before pitchers and catchers report to spring training...
Anything They Could Do Before April To Top What They Have Done So Far This Offseason?
Ditch Buttercup (155 votes)
Trade Bobby Abreu for Bryce Harper (366 votes)
Convince Heat Meiser to Let it Snow in Anaheim on Christmas Day (45 votes)
Reassign Mickey Hatcher to fulltime Bartender at Throwbacks (207 votes)
773 total votes