TORONTO, CANADA - SEPTEMBER 20: Vernon Wells #10 of the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim slams a homerun against the Toronto Blue Jays in a MLB game on September 20, 2011 at the Rogers Centre in Toronto, Canada. (Photo by Claus Andersen/Getty Images) - Getty Images
It's all over but the Great Masshole Implosion of 2011, but surely the Chowdah Choke will have that much more entertainment value if we keep pummeling the competition like we did tonight. Joel Pineiro was good enough for government work (though not helped at all by Chopper's "Who Let the Doghouse Out" performance with inherited runners), but this game was toast after a five-run fifth that featured a signature three-run, swing-from-your-shoetops Jimmy McMuthafletchin' Jack from soon-to-be Rookie of the Year Mark Trumbo. And yeah, I don't know if he's the most valuable rookie, and I don't care, because it's 10:33 on the East Coast, papa's had some wine, and someone forgot to post a post-game post. DEAL WITH IT.
If the Boston Romneys go on with their expected debacle, that would leave us (moves lips, waves fingers, drinks wine) ... well shoot, 3.5 games back of the Wild Card, and 1.5 behind Tampa! The Sawx look terrible, and the Rays play the Yankees like 12 times in the next 5 days. We're still suckers still have hope! OK good night.
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Panther of the Game
Mark Trumbo (125 votes)
Alberto Callaspo (10 votes)
Every single one of us weirdos who haven't quite given up on a season that has no realistic chance, but F Boston anyways (295 votes)
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