Matchup 6; Round 1: Turks Teeth VS Highland Halo

Highlandhalo:

Pro: He is a London folk hero, having kicked a troublemaker off of a moving bus one time. He was also hit by a car while walking the streets of London. England is trying to destroy him, but has failed each time because he’s a tough bastard. He also wrote a screenplay based on the life of Audie(?) Murphy. Just more Highlandhalo lore.

Con: He is the owner of perhaps the worst call in the Halos Heaven podcast history. Luckily for him, it was in the beginning of the call-in era, so perhaps nobody really heard it. Actually, it was unintentionally hilarious how drunk he sounded, so perhaps this is a con as well as a pro.

Turks Teeth:

Pro: He is extremely cool. He knows a shit ton about stuff, including movies and music, which is a characteristic I always gravitate towards in meeting new friends. He also writes a bunch of cool posts for HH, and dishes out stuff that the stat dorks lap up like ravers on a spilled vile of LSD on the San Bernadino Masterdome floor circa 1999. Turks Teeth also wears funny hats and tight, mod-style pants. This almost went in the con section but I decided that it’s awesome(basing this solely on one pic I’ve seen of him).

Con: Back to his knowledge of movies and music, I feel he would probably rather revel in the languid, mise en scene madness of Fassbinder’s filmography than the first three Robocop and/or Die Hard movies films, followed by a poetry reading at his friend’s dimly lit loft, drinking century old absinthe and talking about Goethe’s influence, if any, on neo-sentimentalism. I can do this sort of thing maybe once a year. After that I fear I’d become Belushi from Animal House and TT would be the beatnik playing guitar on the stairs of the frat house.

I love both of these gentleman. Two of my favorite dudes on this site, really, as both have always been very positive, supportive and nice…not to just me, but to just about everybody on this site. I consider them friends that I just haven’t met in person. Yet.

Gonna be a tough choice. That is, if I can even choose one.

…a few words on behalf of HighlandHalo, a man fighting the good fight on behalf of your Halos in hostile indifferent territory, many miles from Orange County.

First of all, the man is indestructible. As Mayhem pointed out, Great Britain has thrown everything it has at him. He survived the Scottish Winters of Inverness – the Scots couldn’t best him – he feels no cold*. He’s survived a variety of run-ins with cars / muggers -The English couldn’t best him – he feels no pain. We dare not send him to Wales – they wouldn’t cope.

• Actually, he really does appear to feel no cold. Every time I’ve met him for a pint, he comes dressed for the beach, irrespective of season – shorts & beach shoes every time- there is absolutely no doubting his Californian roots. No-one does that in London, NO-ONE.

Secondly, his ideas for ‘representing’ in London are ludicrous / madness / bordering on genius. The 2nd or 3rd time I met him, he’d worked out a list of pubs and bars in our fair city that had either the word ‘Angel’ or ‘Halo’ in the name, then told me to bring a baseball cap and a camera, because we were having a London chapter meeting in the most appropriate place we could find.

I think we started here…

God knows where we ended up, (these various Halo-themed pubs seemed to be scattered to all corners of London) I seem to remember (vaguely) that we had a Mexican meal and a skinful. Sadly, and predictably, the photos of that evening are lost to posterity. I do remember asking these two English blokes at the pub to take a picture of us outside. They were unsurprised to find that Highland was an American, I on the other hand had to deal with their deep disappointment – an Englishman in a baseball cap? What are you thinking?

There are a few pubs left on that list. We’ll have to revisit it one day.

Finally, 2 members of the Halos Heaven London chapter, after we’d reached the playoffs in September 2007:

And Highland himself – taking ’er easy for all us sinnners. How could you not vote for this man?