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SOLE POSSESSION

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Fuck the Yanksox, welcome to the best rivalry in baseball - it starts now:

Seeing as the only ring Billy Beane ever won was courtesy of the 1989 cheating McGwire/Canseco steroid World Championship (please put an asterisk there and send the SF Giants their rightful trophy), Mister Jewelry-Free Genius G.M. looked particularly nude (see HC Andersen's "Emperor Wears No Clothes No Matter His Payroll") in a miserable loss to the vaunted Detroit Pussykats this afternoon.

In the top of the 9th in McAchey Stadium, the Fremont She-Wolffs were up 3-1. Last Year's all-star Justin Dukey-Pukey gave up three runs to the offensive juggernaut known as the Detroit Tigers.

Last Year's Man/Rookie of the Year Huston Boulevard was nowhere to be seen in the Save Situation... It was up to Dukey... Here is the recap:

  • M. Ordonez singled to second
  • A. Gomez doubled to right
  • C. Shelton singled to left, M. Ordonez scored
  • R. Santiago ran for C. Shelton, C. Guillen singled to right, A. Gomez scored
  • C. Monroe grounded into fielder's choice
  • B. Inge walked, C. Guillen to third, C. Monroe to second
  • C. Granderson walked, C. Guillen scored
  • K. Saarloos relieved J. Duchscherer
  • P. Polanco grounded into fielder's choice
  • I. Rodriguez lined out to left... 3 runs, 4 hits, 0 errors
But the Moneybawlers were going to brawl, as the Detroit bullpen is best known for supreme suckitude. To their credit, they loaded the bases with only one out, but you know that Moneybawl philosophy: Never bunt, inconvenient variables screw up my spreadsheet calculations....

So Catcher Jason Kendall grounded into a fielder's choice (Ken Doll, despite a ridiculous salary, was acquired as the missing piece of the puzzle last season to accompany Erubiel "Holy Grail" Durazo in winning the west - which did not happen).

Still, bases loaded at home with a crowd of 600 fanatics and a tarp behind them...

So out of the dugout came someone to pinch hit for someone else (The Mathletics are like Styx, Journey, Kansas, Foreigner, Reo-Speedwagon - faceless mediocrities with forgettable hits and memorable chokes) and that guy, what's his name did about what you'd expect for from the other guy who should have or would have or could have batted - the ballplayer at bat struck out. Game over. They built this city on MUN EE BALL (built this city! Buh-BUM bump) and now the Angels have sole possession of first place.