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2008 Angels Game Swag Review

Here is the 2008 Home Game Swag Calendar with a Cool or Lame guess for each giveway.

April 4 Vs. TEX
Magnetic Schedule
Straight to Fridge Prominence thru October

April 5 Vs. TEX
AL West Champions Banner
to Display or Ebay!

April 7 Vs. CLE
Garret Anderson 23-Game RBI Streak Wall Clock
I know it sounds cool, but it will be a hunk of Chinese $hit that will fall apart in like three days if it ever works at all, I guarantee it. Like everything else with this fan base, Garret, you deserve so much better.

April 8 Vs. CLE
Angels Gift Card for 1st 15,000 fans
This is too cryptic... will it be for an amount that is too low to buy anything of real value at the team store? Of course it will!

April 16 Vs. KC
Fleece Blanket
Will have a lame design but they wisened up and are actually giving out the fleece during a cold month!

April 17 Vs. KC
Mike Scioscia Bobblehead
All bobbleheads are cool and Ebay quite well.

April 28 Vs. OAK
Figgins Signature Hat
Wear this when you hide your Figgy-like grin as you bluff at the poker table and cupie folds.

April 30 Vs. OAK
Monthly Calendar
Chances are it will not have Steve Finley and Orlando Cabrera in it...

May 1 Vs. OAK
College Night
Too cryptic, what are they giving away Angels Bucks scholarships? Are they going to see if any Angel can pass the entrance exam to Harvard? to Cerritos College?

May 3 Vs. BAL - Guerrero Batting Helmet (for kids only)
What are they going to dip these in to get the pine tar authenticity of the real Vlad Helmet?

May 12 Vs. CHI - Torii Hunter Bobblehead
Wouldn't it have been messed-up of management to give these out as a promo in a game versus the Twins?

May 14 Vs. CHI - Knit-Cap Beanie
Would have been nicer to give this out earlier in the season where it might have gotten more use, but I will take it!

May 15 Vs. CHI - 70s Flashback Night/1971 Angels Cap
Please please please play Led Zeppelin as the Angels take the field

May 28 Vs. DET - Angels T-Shirt
These are usually under-designed but nice, although they are inevitably L or XL in case you are not tall or fat.

May 31 Vs. TOR - Guerrero Bat and Ball Set (for kids only)
Vlad's bat and balls have already made six or seven children, is this really necessary?

June 9 Vs. TB - John Lackey Bobblehead
I bet if you take the head off this and put it on a vintage 1960s Beatle bobblehead of Paul McCartney most people will not know the difference.

June 10 VS. TB - Beach Mat
Is the concept of skin cancer lost on the front office? How about the stereotypes of Californian fans being illiterate beach bums who only come to baseball games when there is free stuff for them at the gate?

July 5 Versus TOR - Mesh Kids Jersey (for kids only)
Your kid will not get picked last for teams wearing this!

July 22 Vs. CLE - Angels Poster
These get wrinkled before you get them home, and then your mom or wife won't let you hang the damn thing up anyway.

August 4 Vs. BAL - Cucamonga Quakes Night
All this hoopla adds up to is three folding tables near the stadium entrance with six bored teenage jocks trying their hardest to be polite to large women and hyper-fanboy baseball bloggers.

August 5 Vs. BAL - Reversible Floppy Hat
I would post the picture of Missus Halofan wearing hers to show you exactly how lame it is but she would kill me and no jury would convict her.

August 21 Vs. MIN - TBD Angels Hat
they are smart to wait until someone breaks out to determine who gets the hat. If an Angel tosses a No-Hitter before July, he'll be on this one.

August 23 Vs. MIN - Back to School Binder (for kids only)
I don't care about the damn binder with lousy photoshopping of the team, I am just glad all you little runts are going back to the daily penal colony!

August 24 Vs. MIN - Photo Day
The player you want is not there and the one's who are (Quinlan-level types) walk by too fast, but IF you have never done this, do it. If you have, let those of us who haven't yet gotten the shot of Vladdie this time, okay?

August 25 Vs. OAK - 12-Pack Cooler
This one Ebays for top dollar.

August 27 Vs. OAK - Big "A" Night Light
When you don't stub your toe on the bedroom door while taking a 4 AM pee over the winter, you can thank the team marketing folks then.

August 30 Vs. TEX - Chest Protector Backpack (for kids only)
Salvador Dali working for the team... or is that just a group of kids with bad haircuts walking backwards...

September 13 - Vs. SEA - Hispanic Heritage Salsa Bowl
Arte winks at La Raza and celebrates Mexican Independence Day over Cinco de Mayo, but will we be able to put guacamole in it during games against the A's?

September 28 Vs. TEX - Fan Appreciation Day / Team Photo
The prizes have gotten so skimpy lately...

EVERY FRIDAY: Big Bang Fireworks - COOL

EVERY SUNDAY - Some Family day Promotion - LAME - ZZzzzzzzz...

No Rally Monkey Related Merchandise - LAME - Remember what got you here, Angels!