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The Brandon Wood F.U. Memorial Lineup

The American League's slugging percentage is currently .427. Only once in the past 15 years (2008, at .420) has league SLG been any lower than .423.

Know how many Angels in tonight's lineup have a career slugging percentage higher than .423? Three:

3B .384 Figgins
DH .377 Izturis
RF .495 Abreu
CF .472 Hunter
1B .447 K-Mo
LF .410 Matthews
2B .423 Kendrick
SS .364 Aybar
C  .321 Mathis

Brandon Wood, you'll remember, can certainly play DH, SS, and 3B, and the 3Bman in front of him is famous for being able to play all over the field, including LF. So basically we are starting four guys tonight with career slugging percentages of .410 or less, while a 24-year-old who is currently slugging .782 in AAA remains far, far away.

We should NEVER have a lineup this anemic again. What a disgrace.

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