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FSN West Pollo Loco Commercials

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...looks great, but how do you describe it?

Loco Pollo Indeed...
Loco Pollo Indeed...
USA TODAY Sports

So that Baja Shrimp menu commercial during Sunday's Angels telecast got the better of me this afternoon.

Bammo I was in the car and drove the six blocks to the Pollo Loco near my pad knowing finally I could get something there that my pescatarian wife would eat and hopefully enjoy.

The drive thru was quick and the woman even clarified that I had ordered the Shrimp Bowl when I pulled up.

Get home, pull of the lid and what did I find but a Shrimp-Chicken combo. WTF? I had ordered two Shrimp Salads.

Drove back with the merchandise and explained that It was not what I ordered.

The woman at the drive thru insisted she had asked me if I had ordered the Shrimp Bowl and that is what she gave me. I said that the salad comes in a bowl and she hadn't asked me if I had ordered the "Shrimp and Chicken Bowl".

So she gives me the proper thing I ordered - the Shrimp Tostada Salad and asks me to check it to make sure it is right.

The whole time I am interacting with her there is some loud "Charlie Brown Teacher" voice barking at her, practically screaming "Faster Wage Slave Faster!". I point out that the salad comes in a bowl and she says, incredulously "That is a Tostada, the bowl is different" like it is time to roll her ojos at the gringo. So I say "Entiende y tu tostada is shaped like a pinche bowl."

So I call the Pollo Loco complaint line, they answer with like three seconds on hold (maybe Pollo Loco should explain how to organize a call center to Anthem Blue Cross). Basically I told them that they gotta change the wording on the menu and assumed that probably already get a lot of complaints about the difference between thighs and breasts (the hotline operator affirmed this is a regular complaint) so why add to that mess with other confusing menu verbiage.

The operator was pleasant and understanding. She asked if there was anything else I wanted to add.

I took that opportunity to point out that someone away from the drive thru window was riding the server's ass a little too harshly ("...and the executioner's face, it is always well hidden" -Bob Dylan, 1962) and it left the poor girl flustered. Then I told them how delicious the new Baja Shrimp tostada salad was (even though the shrimp are not as big as the ones pictured and even though $6.49 is ehhh... maybe a buck too much).

And lastly, I pointed out that Mike Trout needs a contract extension through at least 2020 and that someone was going to have to pay for it, so if Pollo Loco continues advertising on Angels games, he won't join the Yankees and that will help finance a winning team which will, of course, mean a lot more people will see their adds for Shrimp bowls, salads, tacos and every freakin' part of the damn birds they serve.

She asked me if there was anything else I wanted to add and I just had to throw this one in: Heh heh, when was the last time someone mentioned "Trout" when complaining about Pollo Loco?

She replied: We get requests for fish and chips from some callers.

I thanked her and hung up but have to add here:

We'll supply the fish, keep them chips paying for those commercials.