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HumpLinks: Fear the walking dead...

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Every now and then this offense gets a taste of blood. I'm not sure that this offense knows that it's not among the living....

Kamil Krzaczynski-USA TODAY Sports

One of the least frequently used features of graphically-driven personal computer operating systems anymore are macros. Back in the early 90's they were very powerful user tools and far more common because they could repeat lots of clicks and keystrokes accurately on behalf of complex tasks for people who were still new to computers at all. We all have gotten well beyond that. Only an old fart such as myself would keep any macros handy any longer.

But they do work. They do come in handy. Observe while I select CTRL+SHIFT+ALT+A and sit back and watch my laptop type the following:

Last night the Halos went on the road. Despite the fact that hey were facing a pitcher with a high ERA, in fact, this was a young kid new to the league and it would be the first time the Halos had been to bat against him. Thus, the LAA bats turned this kid into Greg Maddux Jr. and we fans were left helpless as we watched him mow down Halo batters like like John Deere through Iowa. Almost to a man, the Angels batters whiffed up little more than goose eggs, wasting a decent pitching performance in the process. And in the end, one more frustrating "W" as the season slips on into the night. Everybody tip a cap. Everybody turn a page. Everybody pretend like this has no meaning whatsoever once the playoffs start, assuming that the playoffs don't start without us.

Yep. I get to whip that one out a lot, don't I? Makes mornings like these a wee bit easier. Now that I look at it, however, I do realize that I need to update it to cover the obvious idiocy of penciling in role players. Like a Featherston over a Gillaspie at third base just because Featherston bats right and the Halos were facing a lefty. Featherston is hitting .160 against lefties whereas Gillaspie is hitting .222.

By the way, the last time these guys could be bothered to win a game on the road was July 12, in Seattle.

Yeah. That means that the Angels have yet to win a for-reals baseball game away from Anaheim since the All-Star break. Excellent work there, guys.

So here, everybody, have some WE-NEED-BETTER-ADVANCED-SCOUTING-AND-THEN-WE-NEED-TO-KNOW-HOW-TO-USE-THEM-links!!!

(just sayin')

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Angels Baseball
(Before we get started, let's not get too all wrapped around the axle here. We can wait until after the Toronto series this weekend for that. Every team in the AL West lost last night and the Angels are still just a game back.)

Mike Trout: Trout is currently a porn-free zone this month. Since coming back from his wrist injury - or has he??? - his slash line is .213 / .326 / .430 (Matt Joyce territory) with 14 strikeouts and only 3 runs scored. (I manually added last night's box score to this recap from BBR.) And this kind of stuff doesn't go unnoticed, as now we have Josh Donaldson talk and http://emeraldcityswagger.com/2015/08/11/exploring-nelson-cruzs-mvp-case/ and even Mark Teixeira talk popping up around the AL Hell, we are even seeing David Price show up on the scene.............While on the subject of Trout, here's some food for thought..............

C.J. Wilson: Wilson's doctor must have gotten back from vacation, since Wilson saw his specialist yesterday and is set to meet with the team tomorrow to discuss results. If Wilson does, indeed, have bone spurs (which would threaten the health of his throwing arm and his career), the only thing to discuss is whether or not Wilson can play left field, and/or pinch hit..............

Jerry Dipoto: Dipoto's legacy enjoyed a decent market bump yesterday when the Padres DFA'd prospect Taylor Lindsey and reminded us of the growing lobsidedness in favor of Anaheim out of that 6-player deal that caused quire a bit of grief around these parts just a year ago. Lindsey was one of the two most-valued player prospects, along with Jose Rondon, sent to San Diego in exchange for Huston Street and Trevor Gott.  The other key piece, Jose Rondon, was doing pretty good this year at High A but has been crushed to date after being promoted to AA. (The Padres ended up sending R.J. Alvarez to Oakland - where he has been getting hammered as a late reliever - in a package that brought back a mediocre Derek Norris. And the last piece, Elliot Morris, is still at AA.)

FWIW: Mutual Admiration Society as Albert Pujols names Mike Scioscia as a Hall of Fame manager............

Things that make you go Hmmmm?: The Angels are in Chicago, playing the White Sox. Check. So it makes sense that one would find Mike Scioscia in Chicago. And Joe Torre, now with the MLB Front Office, has begun to make the rounds of all 30 MLB teams to chat about the ever changing strike zone and instant replay bugs. Since we know Sosh is prone to chat "discuss" such things with the Front Office (instead of running out and bitching directly in the umpires face when it's actually happening), it makes sense that Torre would go from Detroit - his first stop - to Chicago - as his second stop. It makes sense that Torre would be in Chicago, too. But what the heck is Jim Leyland doing in Chicago meeting with Sosh, tagging along with Torre? Last I heard, Leyland was Dave Dombrowski's special assistant and minor league scout. Dombrowski was fired last week, and it just was announced that Leyland was being retained. Why would Leyland, as any normal part of his responsibilities, be in Chicago? Is there a behind-the-scenes Dumbo connection going on?...........

Dirty Laundry: Meet the one guy who loves the Angels, but has to hate how hard Mike Trout plays the game. Honestly, even though I am far from any sort of expert on the subject, I am always amazed that MLB players roll out onto the field every day is sparkly white uniforms.............

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Elsewhere in Baseball

Ughley: Chase Utley is being shopped. Who here thinks that Utley, now back from the DL and doing pretty well, is actually on an upward trend ala Cargo? He'd be easy on the payroll but he would cost players back and it would be amazing if the Phillies would take the kind of detritus that bagged us David Murphy and David DeJejus. Then again, maybe the Phillies would take Murphy and DeJesus? Hell, thrown in Victorino while we are at it. It does make me smirk to read that a guy like Utley, who is batting a buck 90 on the season, would be feeling all high and mighty with his 10-and-5 no-trade rights............

Ouch: The fastest way to blow your team's chance to make the playoffs is to play as if you are already in the playoffs, even though it's only early August. Unsmart, Russell Martin. Unsmart:

History: :Little League Home Runs in MLB, Part 1, over at Fangraphs is promising to be fun. These are always highlight reel events, reminding us all that even MLB players can be bumbling knuckleheads just like you and me.............

Not-so-dramus: Before the season started, MLB players were polled as to which team they thought would win the 2015 World SeriesThe Kansas City Royals were not it..............

Super-Soaker: Somewhere out there is some group of college slacktivists building an online petition to rail against the symbolism of using squirt guns in public................

Oops: Here is the quickest way to embarrass one's self on the journey to losing a $40 investment, all in the pursuit of an $8 baseball they sell by the score just a few steps away.............

Office Shakeups: The market for guys like Jerry Dipoto keeps breaking wide open every week now............

HoF Goin' Cheap: There are some things that one should not use computers to do. Making historic player plaques for HoF inductees is one of them...............

Progress: On the other hand, there are some things that computers do better than old-school MSM media scribes ever wanted to see happen. Sports Illustrated is moving their office space, and getting rid of their sports library in the process. SI writer Jeff Pearlman writer mourns.  Any of this information that SI has still failed to add to their online searchable database is their own damned fault, and has been lost to mere mortals of interest such as you and me all along, anyway..............

That 70's Show: Sh!t Show, is more like it. back in my youth heyday as an MLB fan, merchandise sucked. Hard. Primarily because it was modeled after real uniforms. Which sucked. Hard. Well, except for that Expos cap. I want..............

Reminder: Copyright laws exist to protect the Big Boys (I'm looking at you, Disney) from the little guys. But because the pursuit of said protection requires a massively high economic barrier to entry (in the form of legal fees driven b the very people who created all those copyright law in the first place) is incredibly high, so those same laws do not exist to protect the little guys. And so we get a Target Stores ripping off a local baseball-themed T-shirt vendor with impunity, because the little guy cannot afford to protect his intellectual property.............

Trading Places: Which players have helped their new team the most? Not those that were traded to Anaheim, I can tell you that............

More like, guidelines: Not when it comes to windups. MLB can be all sorts of persnickety when it comes to every little detail. The incredible length of the baseball rule book is testimony to that. And, yes, there are specific rules about a pitchers windup. But as we have seen in the past, MLB (and umpires) are all too willing to jump through hoops and excuse motions that are clearly proscribed in all those pages. And they are not going to start enforcing things any time soon, as Brad Asmus is finding out...............

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