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Rangers beat Angels 5-3, all thanks to that stupid Loser Pigeon

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LOSER PIGEON!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MLB: Texas Rangers at Los Angeles Angels Richard Mackson-USA TODAY Sports

Angels 2 Rangers 5

The Angels weren’t supposed to lose tonight. I don’t know how much of a beatdown they were set to impose upon the visiting Rangers, in this series (and homestand) opener, but I am pretty sure they were, at the very least, meant to score more runs than Texas. That didn’t happen, and the Halos lost this game. I know, I know; it’s crazy.

Some are going to blame Tyler Skaggs, the Angels’ starting arm, for his 5.1 IP/ 4 H/ 5 R/ 4 ER/ 1 BB/ 4 K performance, which is kind of unfair; that’s not really an uber-ugly set of stats for a pitcher, but it did include a three-run HR from Adrian Beltre. That homer was easily the biggest hit of the game, and ended up being the difference maker by the time the final out was recorded.

Speaking of Beltre, some will blame him for this loss; sure, he only had one hit, but he drove in four runs in this game and that’s so, so annoying. Some will also blame the lineup, who had ample opportunities to make this game closer, or to straight up claim the victory.

The Angels hitters were just 3-13 with runners in scoring position, including an eighth inning, bases loaded scenario that could have had the Angels fans cheering because of a grand slam, and not crying because of a grand slame, like we’ve grown accustomed to here in April.

Mike Trout was money in the late innings, when they were trying to mount a comeback in the ninth, but that’s because he’s Mike Trout. With two men on, and two down, in the ninth, Albert Pujols proved he is NOT Mike Trout and ended the game with a bouncer right to first base. That was all she wrote, folks.

So, plenty blame to go around, make no mistake. But this stupid L is not because of Skaggs, or Beltre’s Big A dominance, or the RISP failure. The Angels lost tonight because of the stupid pigeon...THE LOSER PIGEON.

You’ll notice that FSW was referring to the Loser Pigeon as the Rally Pigeon. This is bullshit. That pigeon showed up when the Halos were already losing, chilled out around first base for awhile, and didn’t add to any of the good guys’ mojo whatsoever. But that didn’t stop the broadcast/social crews from going straight to #RallyPigeon nonsense.

That pigeon brought nothing but garbage vibes, and actually wanted the Angels to lose the game, not win. That’s how pigeons are, trust me. While FSW was trying to name the fake ass Rally Pigeon, I asked HH readers to name the pigeon that was actually on the field tonight, the Loser Pigeon. Here’s some good ones:

(I like how this one doesn’t have a pun or anything, it’s just “Arte Moreno”. Cold.)

So that pigeon is a Loser Pigeon, just remember that, OK? And don’t let FSW start Angels memes, ever. Because then you’ll get stuff like Rally Pigeon, on a night where the Halos lost. To be fair, Victor Rojas called out the false Rally Pigeon during the broadcast, so I’m glad we have someone in the booth that understands the fan base and how mojo works.