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Andrew Heaney throws the game of his life and topples the mighty Astros

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The man strikes out 10, for crying out loud!

Houston Astros  v Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim Photo by Sean M. Haffey/Getty Images

Angels 2, Astros 1

Andrew Heaney has been magnitudes better than people give him credit for. Going into tonight, Heandog had thrown three consecutive gems, two of which were against serious offenses. Yet when you looked at his line, the first thing that caught your eye was that ugly 4.78 ERA.

And now, saying that he might have a talent level closer to his 3.45 FIP might be underselling the man. A. Lot.

Andrew Heaney threw 8 innings of what can only be described as ruthless baseball. The Astros looked vintage (51-113 2013 Astros vintage) against his devastating sliders and brutally located fastballs. He made the eternally nasty Lance McCullers Jr. look like Jerome Williams on a bad day by comparison. He was not stellar. He was not fantastic. He was not amazing. He was absolutely phenomenal. He was the 2012 Mike Trout of pitching today, and nothing and nobody could touch him.

Well, he did get touched once because the Astros are good. But he turned right around and slapped Houston’s hitters square in the face for their transgression. This was a public broadcast, and there would be consequences for such heinous behavior.

8 innings of 1-run ball doesn’t sound like the work of a maniac. It felt like negative run ball though, with the way he was wheeling and dealing. Props to Justin Anderson for his first save and props to Kole Calhoun for the game-saving double play throwout and props to everyone else too who helped to secure the runs, but this was Andrew Heaney’s night.

The Astros offense never stood a chance. How could they have? They are mere mortals, and our rotation is stocked with divine entities. April seems so far away now. Good riddance, honestly.

Note from Htennis: Two weeks ago, I challenged Rick about Heaney’s “goodness,” for lack of a better word. Rick responded that Heaney had actually been unlucky this year, while I contended that he was fortunate to not have a higher ERA. Since that conversation, Heaney has delivered two quality starts, one against Colorado, one against Houston. I take full credit. Thank you all.