Stars align in multiple ways as Angels vanquish Mariners; Pujols shines brightly with 3,000

Angels 5, Mariners 0

The Angels took to their battleships and headed up to the Northwest to face some deadly enemies. On Star Wars Day, the Halos brought the firepower and shutout the Mariners behind some excellent teamwork. Albert Pujols played the wise old sage, turning back the clock to reach #3,000. In the 1st, sitting on 2,999, he lined one into left field, where Jean Segura was waiting with an outstretched glove. He walked in the 4th, playing Yoda, biding his time, waiting to strike. And strike he did. In the 5th, Pujols fought off a pitchers pitch, slicing into right for the magical hit.

He followed it up with a 2-run single in the 9th, essentially putting the game out of reach.

Mike Trout was our young Luke Skywalker, and he was flanked by some fun, loyal guys in Andrelton Simmons and Shohei Ohtani (if you want to figure out who plays Han Solo, Chewbacca, and Princess Leia, you can), recently dubbed “Trohtanba!” The trio combined for eight! (count-em) hits, and Mariners pitching could not handle them.

However, enough cannot be said about the Angels pitching today, led by Garrett Richards, who was extremely efficient through 6.2 innings, fanning 8. Justin Anderson, recently dubbed “Alias 2.0,” was highly effective through 1.1 and maintains an ERA of zip. Jim Johnson slammed the door, and all was well on Pujols’ big night.

In other news, Ian Kinsler continues to be jobbed by umpires at the plate, and he was hitless. Kole Calhoun stepped up to the plate with the bases loaded and no outs twice and couldn’t do anything productive. Dee Gordon looked visibly uncomfortable playing center, breaking the wrong way during a routine flyball and tripping during a Trout triple. The Mariners faithful booed Ohtani redacted, and he made them pay. See you Sunday, Mariners hitters!

All in all, the stars came through, and congrats, Mr. Pujols!